Goodbye 2019, hello 2020 | making changes

I know we're just into February, but happy new year and new decade! I can't quite believe we're in the 20s now, but my goodness January went so slow. 2019 was an... interesting and weird year for me. It wasn't technically the worst, but it wasn't the greatest either. I think I went through every emotion. 

The start of my 2019 was awful. I was in a bad place mentally and physically and eventually got help by being put on an antidepressant and Vitamin D meds. I kinda explain in a post I wrote back in August with a bit of what was/is going on. 

As the year went on, things changed. Good things happened and bad things happened. I'm not the best with change so it was a little hard to deal with at first. Something heartbreaking was my guinea pig Lola passed away in July. She was 7 years old and basically my best friend. I'd never had a guinea pig that lived that long, so Lola was a very special one. I miss her every single day. I have a little bit on my desk where her cremations are and photos of her. I was devastated (and still am) and its still painful to think about, but it'll get easier. 

Some positive things happened in 2019. I got a bunny after wanting another one for so long. Flopsy is the most adorable little bun and she's bought me so much happiness. I'll be uploading a post introducing her soon. My boyfriend and I also got a hamster. Pip is a Syrian hamster and he's so cute. I also wanted another hamster, so I'm so happy I have Pip, he's so cute! 

Talking of boyfriends, I now have a boyfriend, Martin. Martin and I have known each other since we were at school and have always been really good friends. Since I left college in 2014, I hadn't seen him due to my anxiety stopping me from doing things, but we've talked every day since. In July he came round and it was a huge step for me because for years I've hid from everybody I knew and avoided things that made me extremely anxious. We became official in September and I'm so happy. He's amazing and has helped me so much. I'm so grateful and lucky.

In July, I went to see Russel Howard at the New Theatre Royal in Portsmouth. I had never seen a comedian live, so it was a whole new experience. He was so funny and I really enjoyed it. I also visited some lovely places around the summertime. 

I went to Compton Acres in Bournemouth and its so beautiful there. Its a bunch of gardens, all of which are beautiful. The Italian and Japanese gardens were my favourite. I also visited Marwell Zoo on my birthday for the first time in years. They now have a sloth, which unfortunately was hiding when we went, but they've changed so much since I last went. It was an extremely hot and sunny day (which seems to be rare for my birthday, considering its in August), but I had so much fun seeing the animals and spending time with my family.

One thing I did last year was dye my hair for the first time in years. I dyed it purple, however in one light it just looked dark brown and then in certain lights, it looked purple. I always feel a bit better when I have dyed hair, so once that really faded, I dyed my hair again just over a week ago. This time I dyed it bluey/black. In one light it looks black and in another it kinda looks blue. I feel like the blue is a bit more difficult to see, but I like it. 

This year I want to change more than just my hair. I've been needing a change in my life for a while, but actually getting the motivation to do anything has been difficult for me. One minute I'm super motivated and the next it just drops and I'm back to square one. I need to work more on my mental health because theres only so much medication can do. I want to do more fun things and I've done some fun things this year already. 

This year I have some plans and things I want to achieve. I'm not going to be too strict on my goals as I do have quite a lot, but just achieving half of what I have in mind would be good to me. By the end of 2019, I completely forgot what goals I had set myself because I just didn't look at them. It turns out, I only achieved 2 goals (get a new pet and try/buy more ps4 games), so setting myself a bunch of new goals that I will continue to look at is a goal for me in itself.

How was your 2019? Have you had a good start to 2020?